I just came across this obituary of a married Catholic couple, Lou and Patricia DeMuro, who died on the same day after 62 years of marriage. It's a real old-fashioned love story.

It is a very touching story. The simplicity in which this couple approached life and each other is inspiring. Their contentment with what life offered them admirable. This couple's story should be what every person should be looking for when it comes to love and marriage. They offer two key ingredients to falling in love and a successful marriage; approaching life with simplicity and contentment.

Sadly, too many people complicate the process and get too demanding when it comes to their expectations of another person, making it almost impossible to find such love. The more qualifications necessary, the less likely to find happiness and share such a life.

It’s also important to realize that they had very humble beginnings and lived a humble life. They were not angry or frustrated about their financial situation. They were accepting of it, made do, and were thankful for their blessings. They were also very young. That helps too. When you marry young, it gives you more years together. And the more years you have living together in marriage, the less selfish you become.

But this couple have more to teach us about approaching love and marriage. They had an earnest desire to make each other happy and feel special. They did not take each other for granted. Let’s see how the reporter described their life from the research:

• Their life together had few frills but many laughs.
• They would sing the 1950s hit "How Much is That Doggie in the Window?". They listened to the soundtracks from "South Pacific" and "Mary Poppins" hundreds of times. The louder their kids sang along, the more the DeMuros smiled.
• They were a tag team when it came to raising their three kids. When Mr. DeMuro got home from work, he was a hands-on parent, so Patricia DeMuro could head to her night job.
• They did everything together.
• They lived in a two-flat with relatives upstairs.
• The children went to school across the street at Our Lady Help of Christians. They'd come home for lunch.
• When the family moved in 1968, Mrs. DeMuro brushed up her secretarial skills and landed a job at AT&T. Mr. DeMuro was an order filler for Motorola and worked at a cutlery firm.
• They would take bus tours and cruises to Alaska and the Caribbean, along the Mississippi River and through the Panama Canal.
• They loved going to Massachusetts in the fall to watch the leaves change colors.

Laughed a lot, basic living, enjoyed their kids (loud kids made them smile!), sang corny songs, made home-made sausage, hands-on parenting as a team, living with relatives in the same house, kids went to Catholic school, she worked to help bring in money, he worked two jobs, simple pleasures. They did everything together.

Now let’s see how their kids describe them and their life with their parents:

• They remember Dad barbecuing and getting the biggest kick out of watching the kids play.
• The homemade sausage was so good, it spoiled them for anything else.
• Their parents roller-skated, bowled and played pinochle together and even used his-and-hers lawnmowers to mow their grass side-by-side.
• Mom was really in tune with their schoolwork. She was there all the time. She slept while they were at school.
• Sundays meant pot roast for dinner.
• They were always asking them 'How ya doing? Are you OK?' Always checking up on them. They were encouraging.
• Dad enjoyed taking his sons golfing at Salt Creek Country Club in Itasca.
• The family liked hitting Wood Dale Bowl and watching Clint Eastwood spaghetti Westerns at the old Thunderbird Theater in Hoffman Estates.
• Dad would do the shopping and mom the cooking, making homemade ravioli, manicotti, pizza, pineapple upside-down cake and Italian cookies.

Togetherness, availability, genuine interest, hard-working, tender moments, frugality, attentiveness to the children’s needs.

What stands out to me is how happy they were, and more importantly, how happy the children were. Their children felt they had a rich life growing up. They certainly were not poor. Pot roast on Sunday is very middle class. They were careful with their money. And I’m sure they were “savers” and had money due to their being careful with their money and not reckless. They lived within their means, but still did special things. It was not a life of extravagance.

Another thing that stands out to me is that the things the children point out are all have to do with how the couple interacted together at a friendship level. It does not seem that either one dominated the other. The mutual respect seems to be what the children took from their relationship.

It really goes to show that bonding as friends with a mutual respect of each other is a key ingredient to success in marriage. Each person is free to be themselves, yet has a desire to do things together and be together. Seeking someone you can have that kind of bond with goes so far beyond age differences, physical attraction, child-bearing requirements, and the many kinds of things single people allow themselves to get so caught up in.

And this couple took the plunge. They saw in each other someone they wanted to be with; a suitable partner. They did not question it or ponder too deeply about if this is the one God had in mind. They did not reject the other in hopes of finding someone better. They probably gave it no thought at all. Since they were both people who approached life with simplicity and were not hard people to please, they knew how to be content and appreciate what they had. I’m sure this prepared them well for finding the kind of love in another person.

On her deathbed, Mr. DeMuro was brought in to see Mrs. DeMuro. He said “Hi Babe,” and she said “Lou, I love you. I had a wonderful life. I'll see you in another place.” They lived in such close union with each other in that bond of love. So it was fitting that, at the end, they died together, succumbing within hours of each other from a multitude of ailments. Lou had leukemia, Parkinson's disease and was in hospice. Patricia had diabetes, high blood pressure and heart failure. In the end, they both needed others to care for them. But their desire was always to take care of the other, especially each other’s hearts.

It is not dumb luck or a fluke that they cherished each other for 62 years and still felt so close after all that time. They gave themselves completely to the other, and wanted to, and found joy in it. If we all would approach life with simplicity and as content people, without over expectations and qualifications about the people who come along and whom we date, we just might end up with a life of love as Lou and Patricia DeMuro shared.

I did a radio interview where the topic of fear in not being good enough for someone came up. I thought it would be a good thing to talk about a little more thoroughly then we covered on the air.

This is a common happening. You meet someone who seems wonderful, perhaps too good to be true. Suddenly, you are hit with a sense of fear about not being good enough for this person. So you try to sabotage the relationship so you have a good excuse to end it, when what you really did was say, "I don't deserve you.”

It's a shame that this happens. Perhaps it is because we have low self-esteem and think that no one could want us and love us for who we are. Perhaps it is a perfectionist issue that makes us think that we have to be a saint if we are going to make a wonderful, holy person happy in marriage.

Without question, it is a mistake to have this fear of not being good enough. It is a false humility that says "I am not worthy of you." No one is worthy of anyone else. The fact is we are all sinners. We don't marry a saint, but a sinner. Every human being has flaws, imperfections, weaknesses, tendencies, bad habits, any number of other negative aspects to themselves. We should be working on ourselves to correct these things. We should always be understanding that others have their issues. No one is perfect.

For the pursuit of marriage, it is imperative that we never make the mistake of thinking that we are dating a saint, and we are too sinful, weak, or broken for that person. It is also imperative that we do not put that other person on too high of a pedestal, and remember that they, too, are a sinner. If you are ever dating someone who comes across as believing there is nothing wrong with them, and they are picky and critical of you, please run away from that person as fast as you can and never look back.

To have an awareness of your own shortcomings is a great gift, both individually and socially. Individually, this gift helps you understand that before God, you are not yet a saint and have work to do. This should inspire you to keep doing the work of perfecting yourself by God’s grace. Socially, this gift helps you to approach other people with true humility, knowing that you are not "better" than anyone else. You feel honored when someone is interested in bringing you closer into their world. It also helps you approach this person in charity, knowing they have their flaws and issues, and these should be things you accept and gently help the other with.

It is a mistake to be turned off by someone's negative qualities. It is much better to be inclined to seek the good qualities. Let those good qualities overshadow any negative qualities, and (hardest of all) attempt to accept and even embrace the negative qualities. This is the secret of finding a suitable partner for marriage and being willing to make the commitment to that person. Once you are able to find the negative qualities endearing, and understand how both your qualities make you unique as a couple, then you are have what it takes to make marriage last.

If it sounds like what I am saying is that falling in love involves loving the negative as well as the positive, you are correct. Love is a total acceptance of the person, flaws and all. Deep love is experienced as the negative qualities take on an endearment to you. A marriage is in trouble when the two only love each other as their good qualities are experienced. The negative qualities have to be embraced and loved if you are to love each other for a lifetime.

Marriage is where two sinners come together in the lifetime commitment of being each other's path to sanctity. They have good times and bad times. The good times make life easy. The bad times make life challenging, perhaps even a hell on earth. The bad times are often moments where one is experiencing negative things from the other. It is in those moments that our character is tested and our opportunity to take a step forward toward becoming a saint is given as a gift from God.

The security of the sacramental bond protects the two sinners from losing their primary opportunity to become a saint. The union allows the two to fall without the fear of hurting themselves beyond repair. When one falls, the other is there to help navigate them back through the love accomplished by patient endurance, kindness, silence without reproach, and forgiveness. Perhaps it will take being the one to say "I'm sorry" when it is the one who has fallen who, in justice, should be the one apologizing. That is the mercy that true love brings to marriage and mirrors the love of God.

Who among us is good enough for anyone? Do we not realize that God loves us beyond measure even though we are sinners and not worthy of Him? How can we be a person who trusts in God if we don't have peace in His love for us?

We must have this same trust in other persons, especially in the person we will marry. It is a trust that says "despite my unworthiness, I believe in your love for me. I will love you with all I am, by God's grace.” To fear not being good enough for someone is to lack trust in that person and lack trust in God, Who has displayed that love is about giving yourself despite the other's faults and sins.

That is really where the problem lies. We do not trust the other person to take us as we are, with all our faults, flaws, weaknesses. Why would any person love me so completely? The reason is because that is how God loves us. Why should we settle for anything less? As Jesus Himself implied, it is easy to love someone when they are lovable. But not so easy when they are not; in moments when they bother you or hurt your feelings or do something that seems hateful. Human beings are going to have unlovable moments. There is no way around that. Your spouse is going to have those moments. What will you do? Say to yourself "Oh, I made a mistake, this person is not who I thought they were" and then turn away from that person in heart and mind, or even physically leave them?

Marital love does not fear getting hurt. It takes the risk of giving your whole self knowing you might get hurt. Love does not fear failing or not being good enough. Those who feel they are not good enough need to be reminded how God loves us despite our sinfulness, and is always risking Himself by His willingness to forgive us, have mercy on us, welcome us back to His embrace, and shower us with His grace. This is what love requires.

We turn to another human being and say, "You are not my God, nor can you provide me with the level of love that only God can give me. I am not your God. But we can love each other with all our shortcomings and rely on God to give us what we need to persevere when love seems hardest, and enjoy all the moments when we are most lovable, always accepting both experiences as gifts to us for our sanctity."

Fear nothing except offending God. Be yourself. Know yourself, flaws and all, so you know who it is the other is getting from you. Be open to the total person of the other. With this attitude, you will find there is nothing to fear; you can trust someone to love you for who you are. You will have the ability to give yourself to someone that you can love in every way. Your trust in God will empower you to cast away fear of unworthiness and take on gratitude and honor that someone would be so interested in loving you.

Be confident. Fear is a sign of weakness and it will cripple your ability to develop a healthy relationship and get married. Fear is a distraction tactic of the demonic. Confidence in who you are and God's love for you, and your own love for yourself will dispel fear once and for all, and make you very attractive to a potential future spouse. There is nothing quite so attractive in another person as experiencing their confidence in who they are, and their trust in being who they are in your presence. So be humble and confident.  And let the mystery of love flow freely and where it will.

Dear Anthony,

What is the difference between courtship and dating? Is the only difference that dating is casual and courtship is exclusive with movement towards engagement? I don't want to date more than one guy at a time, but I might not want to marry that one guy, either. Does this mean we're just dating?

These terms are often used interchangeably, depending on which one the person feels most comfortable using. A Christian person uses the word “courtship”. You never hear a non-Christian use this term at any time. So courtship, just as a term, has meaning and value to a Christian. However, among Christians, you still hear “courtship” and “dating” used interchangeably; indicating that many single people find the terms to mean the same thing. Why would anyone use the term “courtship” when they are simply “dating”?

I believe it is a “feel good” kind of word. Some Christians find the word “dating” to be a negative term due to their secular counterparts using the term excessively. I think a single Christian person using “courtship” to describe their dating life wants to psychologically believe they are doing something a little better, a bit more nobler than merely “dating”.

These two words, however, should NOT be used interchangeably. They are two very different words, with different meanings, and indicate two different places in the process towards marriage. In fact, with regards to “dating” I should not be too quick to say that this term necessarily included in the process towards marriage.

There is a fundamental different between courtship and dating. Dating does not necessarily mean the persons are interested in marriage at all, let alone interested in determining if this person they are dating might be the person they should marry one day. For many, dating is a form of entertainment, something to do with one’s free time. It is completely possible to date someone with absolutely no intention of considering them for marriage.

Courtship, on the other hand, absolutely does have marriage in mind. To say that you are courting someone or are in a courtship is basically to say “I am moving toward potential marriage with this person, and we shall see how it goes.” It also absolutely implies exclusivity with the person. To enter into courtship means to put a hold on considering any other person for marriage in order to focus on determining if this person you are courting is the one to become engaged to marry.

Notice that courtship is not engagement. To become engaged to a person is to make a decision to marry. Courtship wants to focus only on the person you “think” might be the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Those who enter into courtship are pretty sure they have found the one. They are not going into courtship with any thought that it is not the one. Otherwise, they would not be exclusive. It is quite a big step to become formally exclusive with someone. It is a practice run of making the formal decision to forsake all others on the day you exchange vows. In courtship, you do forsake all others, but not as a vow, but rather as a trial run.

Because it means exclusivity, courtship needs to be a short period of time, and have a definitive end. It cannot be open ended. Otherwise, you risk hurting each other in a way you do not wish to, but can simply because you are not yet married. It risks looking like and acting like you are married, when you have not formally made the commitment. It risks giving in to the temptation to do that one thing reserved ONLY to married couples because you become so used to each other and, what the heck, you love each other and are practically married anyway, so why not?

At the practical level, you want to be in courtship for a short time, with the agreement to get engaged or end the relationship at the end of that time period. This ensures that hearts are not too invested beyond repair, and that both persons are able to become available to new persons.

Another reason courtship is usually entered into when both are pretty certain they have found the one is because the reality of starting over from scratch with a new person and going through the process again is draining and deflating. It’s very similar to building a house. When you have done it once, you are not inclined to do it again. It is much too involved and comes at a high price.

So courtship should not be used interchangeably with dating, and should not be entered into lightly. However, if it the courtship does not work out, you have avoid rushing into a marriage that you may likely have regretted later. Courtship, as a process, ensures that all the right steps have been taken and all the right things have been talked about in order to come to the closest conclusion possible that you are in love and want to spend the rest of your life with this person. I usually advise couples in courtship to make sure they have taken a good, long road trip together so they can experience all the sides of each other, which a long road trip seems to bring out. If you can endure each other’s faults, quirks, and negatives sides, and still say “I love you!”, then you have what you are looking for.

I assume at this point my focus on courtship has provided some insight into what dating is. First, dating is NOT courtship. The best way to describe dating is that it is a sampling process. You date in order to sample the person. You spend non-commitment time with the person in order to see if there is an all around attraction to that person enough to move on to “serious dating.” Serious dating is no longer a sampling process. You have realized you want to be married and have learned more about yourself and the kind of person you are attracted to from your dating experience.

Some people never stop sampling. In fact, they unfortunately allow themselves to cheapen their offering by showing they only want to sample, and never purchase. You know the many sample food stations in Costco? I know a man who told me he goes in there to have lunch by partaking in all the sample stations, and then leaves. As if Costco is in business to hand out free lunches. What is Costco’s goal with these sample stations? To “sell” the product they are allowing people to sample.

Single persons who want to get married are in this same situation. They are putting themselves out there to sample in hopes to find a buyer. This particularly pertains to women, since men are the purchasers (the ones who propose).

Dating today has sadly become a free-for-all of perpetual samplers, which no intention to buy (make a permanent commitment). Worse, they naturally are inclined to want to sample the marriage-only goods as well, proving further they don’t want the commitment and responsibility that comes with the dating process toward marriage. I think these persons should be made to where a tag that says “Samples Only” so the single people serious about finding the right person and ready to make a commitment can avoid wasting time with the sample-only people.

Dating is a great thing, as long as people are willing to make commitment moves. Move on to serious dating, and then to being willing to be exclusive, and then to courtship, and then engagement, and then marriage. Otherwise, it is just socializing with friends. True, serious dating seeks to find your best friend. Courtship confirms that you found that best friend.

I hope this helps.

Yours in Christ,

Anthony

I read a lot of marriage and relationship books. The subject of compatibility comes up often. One I read recently concluded that a marriage can legitimately be over if compatibility problems are discovered along the way. This idea of compatibility being the basis of a good and happy marriage is widely accepted.

As a Catholic, I am not a fan of marriages ending at all. However, marriages do end, and practically speaking I recognize that some marriages end for good reason. If this were not true, there would be no such thing as declarations of nullity from the Catholic Church. Compatibility is something I would recommend that couples have as they determine their decision to get married. But the word does not mean what it has come to now mean; namely, a congruence of interests. This makes compatibility mean that the individuals of the couple have similarities that make it very easy to be together. Even the thesaurus on this Microsoft Word software says that “compatible” means “well-suited”.

Couples with a congruence of interests make marriage look easy. Where there is a congruence of interests, there seems to be no issue of age gap. I am thinking about the great Catholic philosopher, Dietrich Von Hildebrand who married a woman 34 years younger than him, Alice Von Hildebrand. Their deep interest in the Catholic faith and philosophy brought them together and gave them a congruence that made it so age did not matter. Their marriage endured, and Alice has been a widow for many, many years. But she, of course, would never trade the years she had with this man she loved with all her heart.

Does this mean you cannot have a happy and loving marriage if you don’t have similar interests? If you have more differences than similarities?

Many people feel this way, and this definition of “compatibility” is widely accepted. I need to remember what people mean when they speak about “compatibility”. Who wouldn't want to be with someone who is well-suited for them?

However, this is not what the word “compatibility” originally meant. I am a words person. I like to know how an English word came into being; what the roots are for the word. When you look at the Latin roots of the word “compatibility” you find the following:

• “Com” means “with”
• "Pati” comes from the Latin verb “Patior” or “Patiri”, which means “to suffer; to endure”. We get the word “patience” from this Latin verb. The word “passion” in the context of Jesus’ suffering comes from this Latin verb as well.  Other keys Latin roots are “patiens” and “patientia”, both meaning patience,  endurance, suffering.
• “Ability” or “able” means “capacity” or “capable”

The real meaning of “compatibility” is “the capacity to suffer with another person.” In the context of marriage, compatibility is connected to the vow to love one another through sickness and health, for better and worse. It is the bearing of one another for the sake of the other. To endure the unpleasant times or moments with patience.

Do you have the capacity to patiently endure and suffer things that the person whom you choose to marry will present to you? If you do, then you have a key qualification for being a married person.

Suppose your spouse loves to talk about soccer all the time, read books about it, and watch the World Cup on television. They express this interest to you with great enthusiasm. You, on the other hand, cannot stand soccer, and inside, as your spouse is talking about soccer, you cringe, or have a temptation to say something snooty. What do you do? Should you bring out those negative things and present them to your spouse? Or should you keep that to yourself and choose to smile and show support and encouragement to your spouse for their enthusiasm?

True love demands the latter. In fact, the test of your own character and where you are on the road to sanctity is primarily in these moments of having to endure and suffer through that which your spouse enjoys but you do not. A fundamental, practical purpose of marriage in God’s plan for us is to purify our souls through these moments where we must bear the other person.

What if the person wants to talk about something you heard a hundred times before and you don’t really want to waste time listening to it again? This is another occasion to show your compatibility; your willingness to bear with the other. When you do it out of love, you can endure it joyfully, not begrudgingly. That is very important. People can tell when you are not really paying attention. It’s important that compatibility be understood to be the patient endurance with another with JOY!! You accept that you should endure, and you love the person enough to show genuine interest in enduring.

We say a person is “unbearable” sometimes. These moments are perhaps a good time to go on retreat or at least go out for a ride in the car to take a break and collect yourself. Better to do that than to allow the other to see you blow up or do something else hurtful during a time that you should have shown a more loving endurance.

One thing is for certain. We are called as Christians by Jesus to bear one another. “Bear with one another” means to be “compatible”. We are all capable of suffering patiently through difficult times with another person. God’s grace given to us as Christians assures us of that. If we do not, it is to our own detriment, and a wasted opportunity to be perfected and develop good character.

Too often, good relationships are destroyed (sometimes very slowly over time) because of one or both selfishly behave uncharitably toward the other by refusing to share the other’s interests. An abusive level is reached when the one not only does not want to endure it, but also seeks to make the other feel bad about what they are trying to share; to break their spirit. This kind of behavior causes serious damage to relationships, because these acts hurt both persons simultaneously.

It would serve us all well to stop thinking of marriage as happy only when both persons have common interests and similarities that make the feelings of love ever present. Marriage is much more about enduring and bearing the other patiently. It is much better for our salvation if we learn that true love bears all things patiently, kindly and honestly.

Compatibility is primarily about yourself. You must ask, “Am I capable of patiently enduring another person when I don’t feel like listening to what they want to share, or doing what they want to do? Am I capable of allowing another person to grow into the person they are meant to be even if it means suffering?"

If yes, you are a compatible person for anyone you choose, because it is YOU who has to be ready to love when it is hardest to do so. Two people with this compatibility about themselves are able to have a happy and lasting marriage.

Dear Anthony,

I know you get this comment all the time, but I find it so frustrating that I have e-mailed three men this year, with not one response. Not even a "not interested." I know I need patience and I pray to God daily to guide me through this, but just wanted to check to see if something could be wrong with my e-mails.

Thank you for writing, and for sharing with me your frustration. It is true that you need a lot of patience and prayer when going through a process like online dating. But of course, part of the process is how we present ourselves and the actions we take. So let me see if I can offer you anything that might help.

Regarding the three contacts you have made since January, one of the early two is a man who is in a relationship, so he is likely ignoring any contacts. The one you contacted recently is a man younger than you. I know there is nothing wrong with a woman being older, nor your contacting men younger than yourself. That's is perfectly fine. What I want you to understand is that, at least with online dating, men your age or younger are looking for a woman younger than themselves. That is not an "absolute", but it is the norm. You just need to understand that if you attempt to find someone on the site who is your age or younger, you are going to have to be very understanding if it does not happen due to the reality of the norm.

The actual emails you are sending are good. They are short, friendly, and do not come across as forward or desperate. You say "Hello" and that you find something interesting about their profile. You also invite them to contact you. You tend to not specifically say what you are interested in, but rather say "we seem to have similar interests". It's always best to specify the things you find interesting or similar, and than you briefly share what it has to do with you. You could probably just stop there. A man worth his salt will already understand that you are interested in him communicating with you and will know what to do with this brief, friendly contact from a good woman like yourself. If he does not know what to do with it, then he is probably not worth knowing any further.

But let's say he "thinks" he knows what to do with it but is not quite sure and does not feel you gave him enough of an open door to make him feel confident about pursuing you. The way to avoid this is to follow up your nice, brief comment with a question. Asking a question ensures that you communicate you wish be get a reply. So let's say you tell him that you enjoyed reading about his growing up in a large family and that you also grew up in a large family. Instead of saying "I think we have a lot in common, feel free to contact me", you could say something like "I was the middle child but never felt neglected by my parents. What number were you in the family, and did you ever feel neglected?" This will give him a clear indication that you want to hear back from him, and also you give him something very specific to enter into dialog with you about.

Finally, you are only contacting men in your area. I understand why you would only want to meet someone in your state, but it is a long, established fact that the greatest success with online dating comes from being open to meeting someone wherever they are, and that it is very common for it to be two people from at least another state. The right man will fly out to meet you, if you have concern about how a long distance relationship will work. I'm sure that if you configure your attitude to being more open to a long distance relationship, you will find that there are ways to make it work that you otherwise would definitely think could not work when closed to the idea.

My advice is to start contacting men who are older than you (think about 10 years older as a benchmark) whom you find interesting. Don't worry about where they are. It will be good for you to just first experience contacting men who would be open to corresponding with you. That will help you get a better feel for what is possible and what is not possible.

Remember, this is a process you go through WITH God, and being open to the movements of God is very important. The less restriction you give God, the more opportunity and possibility for success God can provide for you. I know it can be frustrating, especially when you do not get a reply after you took the time to write to someone. But the good news is that it only takes one person for this experience to be a success. That one person will come in God's time, and in conjunction with your good efforts. If you are doing everything you can, you have to give the rest to God and not be tempted to control God or the situation with the time-frame you expect things to happen in, or your attachment to what you want to happen when you write to a man. Just do what you have to do, and keep the peace of Christ that is His gift to you, no matter what happens.

I hope this helps.

Yours in Christ,

Anthony

Did you know I produced an anti-pornography documentary recently called "What's That Purple Building, Daddy?"?  I just got the trailer for it. Watch it and let me know what you think.

And please share this trailer with everyone you know. One way or another, all of us are affected by the problem of pornography, whether directly or indirectly. This documentary is a great tool to help fight pornography at the personal and local level. It shows how we can all do our part.

I would also love to see people get the documentary as a gift for others, or for their pastor/church leaders. I know that church leaders are in great need of good material and tools for their congregations when it comes to this unpopular and sensitive subject. It's available at Amazon.com or on www.WhatsThatPurpleBuilding.com.

First, watch the trailer: http://bit.ly/dwAiRm