Ann Hanincik: Financial Independence from Your Spouse

Ann makes some very good points. As a person who had a brief non-sacramental marriage and annulment, I can say there are little indicators of resistance whether they be conscious or not. Certainly keeping finances separate is one. Another is not taking your husband's name. Be aware, be conscious of the indicators that you do not want to unite with a potential mate. The signs are there in the beginning. The issue is being mature enough and conscious enough to see them and brave enough to stop the marriage before it happens.

I think that it is important for a woman to keep some accounts in her own name to insure she has credit in her name. My mother was always especially careful to make sure credit cards were in her name, for example, Mrs. Judy Smith, instead of Mrs. John Smith.

The concern in having credit in each person's name, is that something could happen to one person, be it an illness, an accident, or even death, and now the other person has to take up a career, be responsible for the finances etc. It can be difficult after 5, 10, 15 or even 20 years of marriage to have a spouse die and then find out that the bank won't approve you for a loan (or your mortgage) because you don't have any credit.

I know a friend from college whose husband died when they were in their 20s. A co-worker died in his early 30s. Now both wives had to pick up the pieces and support their families financially. And much as we hate to hear about it, there are still men (and women) out there who will say anything to get what they want - whether it is your money or just to get you in bed (seriously - a friend of the family dated a guy and wouldn't have sex with him before getting married - so he married her just to get the sex! Fortunately, she was able to get an annulment and is now happily married with children).